Five Minute Friday: Release

 
RELEASE
 
re·lease verb \ri-ˈlēs\
: to allow (a person or animal) to leave a jail, cage, prison, etc.
: to set (someone or something) free
: to stop holding (someone or something)
: to allow (a substance) to enter the air, water, soil, etc.
 
My grip is tight.  I want only the best for him.  I don't want him to fail.  I don't want him hurt.  And yet, through the years, I realize that I'm holding him so close that he can't spread his wings.

I pry a finger loose.  Oh, it's hard to let go.  Another finger and another until my hand is open.  He sits there at first, not knowing what to do with his freedom.  Then he carefully moves to the edge, watching me as he goes.  Waiting for my hand to close around him again.  It doesn't.

My hand is open still.  Open and raised to God.  Lord, I don't want to smother him.  I want him to fail.  I want him to hurt learn that every action has consequences.  I really do.  I know it's the only way he'll grow and learn to be on his own.  But Lord, it hurts so.  My fingers have been closed for so long.  I want to hold him close and protect him.

My fingers ache when they're open.  Yet, when my hand is open it is in a position to receive the blessings that God has.  The blessing of watching my baby become a man.  The blessing of seeing him make right choices without me.  The blessing of seeing him fall and pick himself up again.  When my hand is open, I can give him a high five for a job well done without me.

When I release my grip on the boy who is becoming a man, I am not only freeing him, but giving him to you.  Lord, hold my hand and soothe my aching fingers.  Put your arm around me as I wave goodbye to my little boy and wave hello to the man he is becoming.

Five Minute Friday is a wild and wonderful flash mob of words.  Five minutes on one prompt. No overthinking or editing.  Please visit Lisa-Jo Baker and link up with Five Minute Friday to see more.

Comments

  1. Hallo sister! I am your fmf friend today. Your words are incredibly real and true. It made me think of a poem that is one of my favourites, its called Walking Away if you havent read it here is a link to it, about a dads moment of letting go http://setapartwarrior.blogspot.com/search?q=Walking+Away
    May Father lead and guide you as you wave goodbye to the boy becoming a man!
    Aliyah

    ReplyDelete
  2. So beautiful and so true! Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete

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